Loneliness is a feeling of emptiness or hollowness inside you. You feel isolated or separated from the world, cut off from those you would like to have contact with. There are different kinds of loneliness and different degrees of loneliness. You might experience loneliness as a vague feeling that something is not right, a kind of minor emptiness. Or you might feel loneliness as a very intense deprivation and deep pain. One type of loneliness might be related to missing a specific individual because they have died or because they are so far away. Another type might be involve feeling alone and out of contact with people because you are actually physically isolated from people like you might be if you work alone on the night shift or are off alone in a part of a building where people seldom go. You might even feel emotionally isolated when you are surrounded by people but are having difficulty reaching out to them.
Although transitions are difficult, here are some tips to help you cope with the feelings of isolation and loneliness they often bring about.
Starting a New Job
Starting a new job can be exciting. It often means more money, more responsibility and a chance to show your new coworkers and boss just how awesome you are. But starting a new job can also make you lonely. You don’t know anyone. You don’t have someone to eat lunch with. You’ve probably given all that up to take this job. Sure, you left the comfort of your old job, but you did it because your new opportunity is a better one. That’s what you have to tell yourself when the loneliness creeps in.
There is much you can do to feel less lonely. Break down barriers. Be friendly and chat up your coworkers. Make an effort to get to know them. Ask them about their favorite lunch spots or where they like to go for a cup of coffee before work. You may be invited to join them!
Ending a Relationship
Whether or not you did the dumping, being without your partner is going to sting—especially if you’ve been together for a long time. All the things you used to do together you have to do alone now, or not do at all. Sure, you can take a friend along, but it’s not the same. So what’s the solution to this kind of loneliness? Start dating again when you’re ready and make new memories with your new significant other. If you’re not ready to date yet, make time for the friends and family you probably neglected while you were in a relationship. Reconnect with them. And if they’re hesitant or feeling like you’re only interested in them now that you’re single, apologize and promise them that you’ll get better at balancing love and friendships next time around.
Moving to a New City
Moving to a new city can be overwhelming. Whether you’ve moved for school, your career, love or to be closer to family, you’ll need to build a new social circle. You’re going to feel lonely, but don’t wallow in it. Get out and meet new people. Try Meetup.com and join groups that revolve around your interests. And if you can’t find a group that meets your needs, create your own!
Explore the city. Find the best restaurants, gyms, markets, dry cleaners, etc., in your neighborhood. You have the power to make a new city feel like home. And once you get comfortable, invite friends or family to visit. You’ll have plenty to show them.
Death of a Loved One
Sometimes we can prepare ourselves for the death of a loved one; other times it is a sudden and complete shock. Out of all the experiences that can make a person feel lonely, this is, by far, one of the worst. It’s so easy to feel depressed and angry, but the key is not to let those emotions consume you. Reach out to friends and family for support, and if you feel like you need more support than they can offer, turn to a counselor or psychic for more care. And if you feel like this kind of loneliness is insurmountable, think about your loved one who has passed. Ask yourself how they would feel if they knew you were wallowing in sadness and depression. They’d want you to move on. They’d want you to be happy and healthy. So, you need to honor yourself and honor their memory and move forward.