Putting yourself first is actually a healthy thing to do. In our society we extol the virtues of martyrs and people who selflessly give to others. And while it is admirable to devote your time and energy to worthy causes and helping people, doing so at the expense of your well-being is not healthy. It can lead to illness, exhaustion and poisonous feelings of resentment. Don’t neglect your needs in order to fulfill the needs of others. Sometimes we struggle to keep resentment out of the mix. It’s okay to put your needs first and love yourself.
If you start to find small moments in the day to do something you want to do, something that is just for you and no one else, a very beautiful picture of life begins to develop. It is a slow process because it has taken you a lifetime to reach the place you now reside.
Begin to value yourself. As the old Golden Rule states, “Love your neighbor as you love yourself.” Most people get stuck on the idea of loving their neighbor. They forget there is a second part to the rule: love yourself that much, too. Remember to put your needs first.
When you begin your day, do you think of something you want to do for yourself or are your first thoughts about the needs of others and how you are fighting to find the time to cram everything into a meager 24-hour day? When do you find a moment to fulfill your needs? Can you put your needs first?
The Needs of Others
Soon, we learn to put the needs of others in front of our needs. While this is a wonderful and benevolent idea, it is in direct opposition to the natural course of action and desire. There is a great difference between being consumed with one’s own desires (to the exclusion of all others) and allowing yourself to become a martyr, waiting to be saved by those for whom you are sacrificing everything. It is in the difference of these two extremes that balance and genuine self-appreciation rests. The target for a truly happy and fulfilled life is hiding in plain sight between these two points of excess.
In the busy days ahead, begin to love yourself more and make yourself a priority like the other people in your life. As you begin to appreciate yourself more, you will notice that others are beginning to appreciate you, too. People will treat you exactly as you tell them you expect to be treated.
Let your needs be defined and noted. Know that you deserve the dignity and priority that comes with the human experience. Allow your psychic self to guide you into a natural and powerful truth! Listen to your intuition and remember who you are! You are here in this journey to have your needs met and desires answered, too. Do not allow the shame or guilt manufactured by others keep you from living your truth!